{"id":19378,"date":"2026-01-04T17:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-01-04T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.psyke.es\/cuando-dices-no-averigua-a-que-estas-diciendo-que-si\/"},"modified":"2026-01-10T13:15:33","modified_gmt":"2026-01-10T11:15:33","slug":"cuando-dices-no-averigua-a-que-estas-diciendo-que-si","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.psyke.es\/en\/cuando-dices-no-averigua-a-que-estas-diciendo-que-si\/","title":{"rendered":"Cuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cuando alguien se te planta delante y te pregunta, sin pesta\u00f1ear: “\u00bfoye, t\u00fa podr\u00edas ayudarme a hacer la mudanza este domingo?” Y t\u00fa la miras at\u00f3nita (porque sabes que ella sabe lo agotada que est\u00e1s), y descubres que tu boca ha dicho que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d, sin que medie tu raz\u00f3n… descubres que tienes un problema: no has sabido priorizar tu necesidad<\/strong> de descanso porque ha pesado m\u00e1s tu deseo de no defraudar a tu amiga que tanto quieres.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Es una l\u00e1stima que hayamos tenido que cumplir a\u00f1os y sufrir muchos \u201cs\u00ed\u201d a la fuerza, para que nos demos cuenta de que muchas veces, demasiadas veces, hemos antepuesto a los dem\u00e1s por no saber respetar nuestras necesidades.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mira que cuesta decir que \u201cno\u201d. Cuesta por educaci\u00f3n, por miedo a decepcionar, por esa idea absurda de que ser buena persona es estar siempre disponible. Sin embargo, decir \u201cno\u201d es una de las pr\u00e1cticas m\u00e1s profundas de autocuidado<\/strong>. No es rechazo; es honestidad. No es ego\u00edsmo; es coherencia. Y, parad\u00f3jicamente, no se aprende estudiando c\u00f3mo se hace: se aprende a decir \u201cno\u201d dici\u00e9ndolo muchas veces<\/strong>. Al principio lo vas a tener que hacer en contra de tu voluntad de cumplir con el patr\u00f3n que siempre has desempe\u00f1ado.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Parece mentira que aunque hayas dicho que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d mil veces, el d\u00eda que te armas de valor y dices que \u201cno\u201d, el otro se coja un cabreo que no veas. Y es que lo ten\u00edas tan acostumbrado a tu entrega, que te ha confundido por un siervo. La \u201cculpa\u201d realmente no es suya, es tuya por haberte prestado alegre e inconscientemente sin darte cuenta de por qu\u00e9 lo hac\u00edas. Cuando pones la necesidad del otro antes que la tuya (real), en el fondo te est\u00e1s faltando al respeto<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cuando no decimos \u201cno\u201d, estamos diciendo \u201cs\u00ed\u201d a nuestra costa. Cedemos tiempo, energ\u00eda, sue\u00f1o y descanso. Y eso tiene un precio. El cuerpo lo paga en forma de tensi\u00f3n y cansancio acumulado<\/strong>. Date cuenta de que para evitar que el otro se enfade, que piense mal, que nos critique, estamos cargando con un malestar mucho m\u00e1s profundo: nuestro propio bienestar<\/strong>. Y no estamos hablando de ego\u00edsmos, estamos hablando de necesidades reales.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Y \u00bfsabes qu\u00e9? Cuando te des cuenta de que hacer las cosas a la fuerza te genera un tremendo resentimiento hacia la persona que te lo pidi\u00f3, descubrir\u00e1s que el verdadero rencor es hacia ti mismo por no haber tenido la valent\u00eda de decir educadamente \u201cme encantar\u00eda poder ayudarte, pero en estos momentos necesito cuidarme. Lo siento pero no voy a poder\u201d. Porque si t\u00fa no cuidas de tu salud, petar\u00e1s; y as\u00ed no vas a poder ayudar a nadie, ni siquiera a ti misma.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Atrevernos a poner l\u00edmites consiste en tener el valor de amarnos,<\/em> incluso cuando existe el riesgo de decepcionar a los dem\u00e1s<\/em>“.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Cita de Bren\u00e9 Brown<\/a><\/strong>, de su libro \u201cThe Gifts of Imperfection\u201d (2010)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ilustraci\u00f3n de Laura Callaghan<\/a><\/strong> de Anna Dostoyevskaya, la segunda mujer de Fyodor Dostoyevsky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sugerencia: Meditaci\u00f3n n. 13 – \u201cMeditaci\u00f3n de la Monta\u00f1a\u201d<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Esta meditaci\u00f3n sirve para desarrollar la firmeza y la sensaci\u00f3n de poder interior, adem\u00e1s de la aceptaci\u00f3n de lo que se nos presenta en la vida. Sin dejarnos arrastrar por reacciones automatizadas y a la vez manteniendo la firmeza dentro de nosotros mismos. Buena pr\u00e1ctica\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Cuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026 si t\u00fa no cuidas de tu salud, no vas a poder ayudar a nadie. […]<\/p>\n

Read More… from Cuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":19357,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[90],"tags":[112,421],"class_list":["post-19378","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-therapeutic-reflections-emotional-intelligence","tag-inteligencia-emocional-en","tag-limites-en"],"yoast_head":"\nCuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026 - Psyke<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Cuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026 si t\u00fa no cuidas de tu salud, no vas a poder ayudar a nadie.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.psyke.es\/en\/cuando-dices-no-averigua-a-que-estas-diciendo-que-si\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Cuando dices \u201cno\u201d, averigua a qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s diciendo que \u201cs\u00ed\u201d\u2026 - 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